days of our life...

shantaram...

2006-04-14T01:31:00.000+10:00

i was at work yesterday when i got a text from dev saying that a movie is being made on the novel shantaram starring johny depp to be released in 2007... believe me i never knew i could be so excited!!
Shantaram is an autobiography of the author gregory roberts who escapes from a prison in melbourne and spends the next 16 years in bombay.. yes BOMBAY!! being a book lover,, i have read a hell lot of books.. both fiction and non-fiction.. but believe me,, if i ever were to name a favorite,, it would be shantaram.. no other book has got me so emotionally involved as shantaram.. it has got everything.. love, romance, passion,hatred, excitement, war, yes i mean a real war,,based in afghanistan..(can u beat that??),emotion,, blah blah blah everything.. i remember i actually cried when one of the characters prabhaker dies in the book..
the best part of the book is that its all about bombay.. i remember i first read the book at my grandparents house at churchgate.. every evening i uesed to go to colaba and cuffe parade just to see and have a feel of the areas described in the book.. leopolds,, montegar,, world trade centre slums,, everythin.. i was so engrossed in the book..
being away from home,, whenever i miss bombay all i do is pick up the book and start reading it.. it brings me back to bombay.. back to the most exciting city in the world..
anyways im desperately waitin for the movie to release.. i guess johny depp will do a good job as lin.. but am dying to see the the characters abdullah taheri, qasim ali, abdel kader khan, prabhaker, karla,, come on screen.. i jus hope the movie does justice to the book.. as mostly the director always screws it up.. harry potter 3 and 4 were so disappointing.. i guess da vinci code will be the same.. but ill be really upset if they screw up this one..
anyways do read this book.. a journey of a mans life can never be so exciting as this one..

anyways...

2006-04-11T15:42:00.000+10:00

anyways,, this was wat the last one and half months were all about.. the last 6 posts describes it all.. it included everythin.. fear, tension, work, work, work, study, study, study, a vacation following it,, exhilaration, satisfaction,, everythin except romance.. which is not possible in sydney.. for me at least..
as of now,, im looking forward to a lot of things.. have been invited to a dinner with some freinds at maroubra tomorrow.. lookin forward to it.. then have to attend an e-commerce meeting nex wednesday.. feelin a bit optimistic about it.. don know wat it is and wat its about.. but still.. then i have a lot of shifts this week.. i think im working 36 hours this week.. not bad.. then easter weekend this week.. might go for shopping.. cant wait to buy those 120$ shoes..that is if they are still available.. and finally,, counting days till 7th of June.. the day i leave for bombay!!! for a vacation.. but i feel i shouldnt do this as ill hate it to come back.. but cant wait to go home!! really cant..
anyways,, as for now,, its back to work,, and back to sarah jessica parker and her new york gossip in sex and the city..

home coming...

2006-04-11T15:32:00.000+10:00

this is somethin i must write about..
this saturday,, the 8th of april,, andy and i decided to go to strathfield just to have a look around.. how things have changed after we have left and all..
we reached strathfield station at 3pm.. came out towards strathfield square... and man!! i must say it felt as if we have come back home!! the square was so inviting.. immediately memories started flooding.. memories of the 5 months spent in 8/19,, in strathfield.. with gauri, saumil n everyone.. it really felt like home..
of course couldnt stay there long enough.. saba called up and i had to go early for my shift.. so were jus there for an hour.. had a kebab and came back..
but still wen i think of it,, it feels great.. i have moved 4 houses back in bombay but never felt this way ever.. must be somethin in 8/19, in strathfield,, that is the root of all our relations in sydney..
even though we can never move back, the memories will always remain an integral part of our life.. long live the 8/19 family..
cheers..

1/46 west parade

2006-04-11T03:56:00.000+10:00

well thats our new home.. 1/46 west parade, west ryde..
share the flat with andy.. pretty nice place for the two of us.. wil take some pics and post soon..
the reason im writin this is that im really proud of this place.. i mean we v have chipped in money n furnished it real well.. much better than 8/19.. jus a minutes walk to the station n walkin distance to my job.. so its pretty convenient.. and closer to andys work too..
well thts it.. cant really write abt a house..
so will move on to other sthings now..

4th of March.. saumil goes back..

2006-04-11T03:30:00.000+10:00

had been dreading this day since a long long time.. 4th of march.. the day saumil was to leave for india for good.. that meant just me and andy now.. from 5 of us,, to only 2 now.. wen gauri left it was ok since we were still 4 of us livin together.. of course i miss him.. but never felt it..
hunny left a week after gauri.. left as in jus moved to the city with his wife.. don miss him a bit..
but saumil?? we had been living together for 5 and half months now.. in essence,, we were together the most as everyone else used to work whole day.. jus me n saumil used to be home.. so in a way i was closer to him than anyone else..
to be honest,, i was dreading that day for a selfish reason too.. as i would be alone after that since andy works 9-5.. but in reality,, i would miss our long conversations,, stupid arguments,, and his always tryin hard to improve me..
but then he did leave on 4th.. and that was it.. we were there to see him off..
right now if he had been here he would be watchin some shit english movie on fox and i would be on the net.. as usual.. or fightin with him over the channels..
yh its true.. i do miss him..
seriously bro,, was nice havin u around. all the best with ur life.. ull do great..
waitin to meet u in bbay..
cheers..

hell?? or a new beginning??

2006-04-11T02:51:00.000+10:00

anyways the next few days.. from 19th of february to 6th of march.. can be described in just one word.. HELL!!
wen i say i have never felt much closer to God than then,, i should also add that i experienced hell too..
started on 19th itself.. after a tiring 17th and even tiring 18th,, i leant that i had to go with hunny that night to mobil for training.. that wasnt so bad.. but the events that followed it,, were worse..
met saba, the manager, that morning.. she explained the training process,, which was ridiculously long.. that same afternoon i had to attend a shit seminar.. and the next morning itsle at 6AM,, i had to start training with her..
theres somethin i should mention here is that i dread mornings.. especially getting up at 4 in the morning to be at some place at 6.. that too for training!!! call it bad past experiences or watever,, i dread it like anythin.. it still gives me the creeps jus thinkin about it..
anyways training was hell.. especially wen i asked her if i can continue after a week as i had exams and assignments in between.. her answer was simple.. don waste my time.. its a polite way of tellin fuck off and fuck you and just fuck the hell off.. so i had to continue with trainin.. even though i had 3500$ at stake shud i fail in my exams..
so that night again had to train with hunny.. hunny can be a real mean bastard at times.. not at times.. always.. n he let it show it to me tht he is a mean bastard..
met manager again in mornin.. asked her if i can come 2 days that week and then after exams.. she agreed to this at least..
but for me,, in the next 10 days or so,, i had to squeeze in 2 dreadful assignments,, on topics i had never even heard of,, 2 final exams,, 4 days of training,, and shifting houses.. i can say my average sleep that period was max 2 hours per day.. surviving on 2-3 red bulls and vs and lots of caffeine,, i pulled through.. i remember stayine awake 3 full nights,, going for training,, giving an exam immediately after coming back,, staying awake again and submitting assignment,, then another assignment,, then another training,, then another final exam.. and after givin that final exam,, packing the entire night as we were moving to west ryde the next day.. well giving the exam put the worst things behind.. but still that shifting would be so difficult,, i had never imagined.. nxt 3 days were spent going to and fro from strathfield to west ryde,, packing,, unloading, cleaning and more cleaning and even more cleanin.. never knew wen it would end..
finally wen we successfully moved,, got a call from manager that i had to complete a training CD and give some exasm that would take 10-12 hours.. so did that too..
finally on 3rd March everythin was settled and spent the evenin at devs place relaxing.. i still had to go for training for a couple of hours that night but that was peanuts compared to what i had been through..
in all this time,, i had the alternative to quit training.. that would mean losing that job too.. big deal.. as it is i had gone through a dozen jobs unsuccesfully.. i could start hunting fro jobs again after exams.. i was in a way prepared for that.. but then i thought.. why do i always in the last 4 months lose jobs when im halfway through it.. i cant always blame the managers.. there has to be somethin wrong.. i knew i was putting in my efforts.. but i realised that the little extra effort which i never put in may be the reason.. since im anyways doing all this crap,, ill do it a bit more.. and then leave it to God..and it did help.. at the end of it,, wen i look back now,, i smile.. i could give my exmas properly,, got satisfactory results in all exams,, shifting was done with beautifully.. my home in west ryde is one which im proud of.. and im making good money.. of course not that much considering the fact it is my vacation and i can make much more,, still it is a much decent sum.. i could remove a part of my ticket expense for coming to india,, could shop a bit.. yes!! shop.. first time since i left home i actually shopped!! yh it feels great.. sure does..
y am i writin all this?? maybe wen i come across this situation again sometime later on in my life,, i can read this and draw a little bit of inspiration..
life is not bad.. it is not a bed of roses.. but we can surely make it a bed of roses with a little bit of extra efforts.. and choosing the difficult path.. believe me,, the feeling of exhilaration after this all ended and i started with my job is somethin i had not felt in a long long time..
hell?? i think it is definitely a new beginning..

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MIHIER...

2006-04-11T02:32:00.000+10:00

18th of feb.. my birthday..
birthday?? seemed nothin like it..
reached uni on time.. sat for the exam.. by the grace of God,, it went well.. learnt a week later that i topped the class and got some 31/35.. not bad..
anyways after the exam,, i don remember wat i did and wat i studied that day.. i had lectures till 4.. was sitting with a goan guy named noel.. admiring the aussie chick sittin in front of me in a backless top.. well frankly speaking her back is all i remember that day.. hehe.. funny.. somethings can never change..
left for home after the lecture.. the goan was with me till strathfield.. never once did i mention to him that it was my birthday.. i jus wanted it to get over..
tried sleeping after goin home.. but was feeling real nauseatic.. tried vomitting but that too never happened..
had to go to devs place in the evenin.. they had planned a party for me.. couldnt say no.. so went there with saumil and andy.. thought it wud make me feel better..
everyone was there.. hunny had ome with his wife.. (wife??).. sushant had come.. he was back from india a week before after screwing up things at my place.. i was all set to pick up a fight with him with regards to wat he had done.. but the moment i saw him,, i dismissed the thoughts.. some things are just destined to happen.. and it is good that they happen wen u look at them in the long run.. anyways at the end of the day,, he was a nice guy..
so jus let the party flow.. i remember cutting a cake and uncorking a champagne bottle.. but my mind was definitely somewher else.. after that they were playin tash and since i don know cards,, i din join them.. for the first time i was glad i din know how to play..
it went on till 2 or 3.. i had uni the next day so i decided to go to sleep..
but still i couldnt.. the hallucinations continued.. n i spent the night jus lying down n thinkin.. of the past one year.. how things were changed... how i was stuck in this goddam jail named sydney.. and how the nex year would be like.. well the start was definitely negative.. much below negative i should say..
anyways a birthday is still a birthday.. happy birthday mihier..

the 17th of feb..

2006-04-11T02:00:00.000+10:00

wow.. long time since i actually sat n wrote somethin.. usually its jus TV, sarah jessica parker n her usual new york gossip in sex n the city,, which i must admit i actually like it!! hehe.. seriously i cant believe myself sometimes..
but the last one and and half months were really something else!! never ever in my life i have experienced such emotional turmoil,, such mental stress, such satisfaction at the end of it, and believe me never felt more closer to God..
it all began that one hot february evening, precisely the 17th of Feb, when i recieved a phone call from my dad.. i was just on my way to uni for an evening lecture.. anyways the phone call was short and simple.. your grandmom just passed away..
and i was speechless.. i had of course expected it.. and since a few days before that had avoided picking up the phone for any reason just dreading this.. yes i knew this was to happen.. but never felt the reality could be so simple and so shattering.. saumil was home then.. watchin india pak highlights.. i dint say a word to him. jus picked up my stuff and left.. the two minute walk to strathfield station was never so long.. my heart was just not ready to take this. and i was emotionless.. i felt i should at least share it with someone.. who better than saumil.. sent him a text... and within a second he called up.. i jus couldnt talk to him.. jus made small talk and hung up.. then came the lecture.. survived it.. had a midterm next day so the lecturer was jus givin last minute tips.. jus din feel any of it goin to my head..
anyways reached home at 8-30.. dev and anvita had come over.. everything seemed normal and unchanged.. except for me.. dev and andy were having scotch.. had an excuse for not joinin them.. my exam.. sat there for 10 min and went to my room and started studyin.. i knew i had to do well.. that i couldnt let this affect my marks.. so jus sat n studied.. dont remember anythin else that happened.. except tht andy had come in and spoken to me about it.. din make me feel any better..
jus sat there waitin for the day to get over.. for my studies to get over so that i cud jus go and sleep over it.. but as u know,, and for some of u who dont know,, 18th feb is my birthday.. so had to wait till midnight at least..
birthday?? din even feel the slightest tht its my birthday.. yh true.. saumil n andy wished me at 12.. folks called up.. karishma called up.. jus cudnt react.. i thought the best way to end this was to go to sleep..
well i tried doing that.. but even sleep was not in my favor that day.. in just an hour i was back up and since din have anythin else to do,, started studyin.. studied till 3-4 i think.. then went online.. gunjan and tarveen,, my two favorite ppl to talk online were there... both cheerful and bubbly and wishin me and all.. i couldnt stand it and logged off again.. spent the rest of the night sittin in the balcony and thinking and thinking.. of wat i don know.. maybe of the times i spent with my grandmom.. back home.. wen i was a kid.. till the time i left home.. i had a feeling wen i was leaving home and wen she had come down the building to drop me,, that this was the last time i would see her.. and as some of my feelings do come true,, so did this one.why did this one have to be true? i still cant fathom..
anyways that night i still feel i was hallucinating or somethin.. still cant remember wat i was doin.. all i recollect is my alarm going on in my cellphone and i was still in the balcony..
time to go and give an exam..

happy valentines day..

2006-02-14T16:16:00.000+11:00

today is supposed to be valentines day.. i have never understood why do u need a special day to proclain your love.. for me,, valentines day is 24*7*52.. but some goras are not of the same opinion and they decided to celebrate 14th feb as valentines day in memory of some saint valentine..

well thz abother story.. the world is ruled by the west.. n even if it isnt true,, the east ape the west nevertheles... so it seems ideal to write somethin for my love.. to start with,, i wish her a very happy valentines day.. to this day,, i dont ever remember gifting her anythin on valentines day.. maybe because am always broke.. or maybe because i realise it had been valentines day 2-3 days later.. anyways,, history repeats itself this year too.. for two reasons again.. one that its technically not possible to meet her n gift her somethin sittin here in sydney.. n second that im still broke..

anyways comin back to the topic,, i wish her a very happy valentines day.. n hope that she has a good time today celebratin one of her frns birthday which is coincidentally today.. .. n hope she misses me today.. well she always does so it doesn make sense hoping tht..
n i wish to tell her that i love her a lot.. n miss her a lot too.. n maybe we can celebrate valentines day wen i come home in june.. id like to thank her for all the love n unconditional support shees always given me.. n hope tht she continues doin the same in the years to come..

its been almost 5 months since iv seen her.. n a lot more months to go.. n as every day passes by,, i miss her more n more.. i jus hope all goes well n i can afford a vacation back home in june..

for now,, i don know wat to write.. i cud have written a lot more.. but my mind is blank.. jus listenin to a beautiful song right now.. one of my favorites.. wish to dedicate it ho her..
love u lots baby..

"My Love"

An empty street, an empty house
I hole inside my heart
I'm all alone, the rooms are getting smaller.
I wonder how, I wonder why, I wonder where they are
The days we had, the songs we sang together.(oh yeah)

And all my love, I'm holding on forever
Reaching for the love that seems soo far

[Chorus:]
So I say a little prayer
And hope my dreams will take me there
Where the skies are blue, to see you once again... my love.
All the seas from coast to coast
Find the place I love the most
Where the fields are green, to see you once again... my love.

I try to read, I go to work
I'm laughing with my friends
But I can't stop to keep myself from thinking. (oh no)
I wonder how, I wonder why, I wonder where they are
The days we had, the songs we sang together.(oh yeah)

And all my love, I'm holding on forever
Reaching for the love that seems so far

So I say a little prayer
And hope my dreams will take me there
Where the skies are blue, to see you once again... my love.
All the seas from coast to coast
Find the place I love the most
Where the fields are green, to see you once again...

To hold you in my arms
To promise you my love
To tell you from the heart
You're all I'm thinking of

Reaching for the love that seems so far

So I say a little prayer
And hope my dreams will take its there
Where the skies are blue, to see you once again... my love.
All the seas from coast to coast
Find the place I love the most
Where the fields are green, to see you once again... my love.

Say it in a prayer (my sweet love)
Dreams will take it there
Where the skies are blue (woah yeah), to see you once again my love. (oh my love)
All the seas from coast to coast
Find the place I love the most
Where the fields are green, to see you once again.... My Love.

--------WESTLIFE(coast to coast,2000)

2006-02-10T01:56:00.000+11:00

the SOFA..

there are a few things in life.. howver small they might seem.. which tend to make a difference.. n make u feel excited.. this is one small thing.. which may seem trivial to someone.. but it makes a big difference to me!!
jus yesterday andy n i chipped in money and bought a new sofa-cum-double bed for our "new" house in west ryde.. jus cost us some 60 bucks.. some people may compare this cost to 6 packs of cigarettes.. or maybe a night out in the city.. but to me and andy this was different... it was probably the first piece of furniture we had ever bought.. i was jus chattin with my dad online yesterday.. after a long time.. n he could make out i was excited.. n he told me that im happy that u r excited for it.. coz it will make u wanna do it again.. he told me to imagine how escited i wud be wen i buy my own house.. my own car.. start my own family.. be independant...

now this makes me remember a movie.. bluffmaster.. am a very confused guy.. always goin from one topic to another.. but this actually reminds me of a dialogue in bluffmaster.. wen boman irani tells abhishek bachhan.. do u remember the first time u rode a bicycle? the first time u fell down n skinned ur knee.. the first time u fell in love..your first kiss.. your first touch... your first paycheck.. your first suit.. do u even remember 30 events in your life that has made your life worth living? for if u cant,, then wat have u achieved in life?? zilch..
well i certainly cannot remember 30 events in my life which has made my life worth living.. but i plan to go back in time n recollect.. maybe in my next post ill put it down.. maybe wen im 60 years old and dying.. ill read it n tell my grand children wat had made my life worth livin..

anyways thts a far fetched thought.. as for now,, the sofa will do.. cheers to me.. cheers to andy.. cheers to our bank saumil.. cheers to dev n anvita.. n cheers to rest of the 8/19 family..

2006-02-08T11:39:00.000+11:00

BIZZARE!!

a list of 13 events over the last 4 months which makes me think what the hell is this all about??

1. Somethin that has never ever happened before to ANYONE in strathfield.. got MUGGED in my third week in sydney right ouside 8/19... and some people are of the opinion that strathfield is the SAFEST place around sydney.. hehe

2. now this is bizzare.. my second job in sydney.. at a desi petrol pump.. n right after i start training the petrol pump is ROBBED.. around 35000 LITRES of petrol stolen from the dips.. so rest assumed that i lost that job too.. n the owner is now broke..

3. and before that,, wen i had gone for the interview,, the owner got HOSPITALISED!! hehe

4. talking about jobs,, jus heard last week that the company i first worked in,, Ions Direct Pty Ltd.. is now DISSOLVED!! wow...

5. i was paid 260$ for a weeks work in this company.. only to get a letter from my bank some 2 months later that this was a "MISTAKE PAYMENT" and im supposed to pay it back to the company..

6. i almost got caught in PLAGIARISM in my first assignment in my first semester in my first unit.. talk about a good start man!!

7. Coming to my third job now.. at Mobil West Ryde.. got kicked out in 2 days due to "bad customer service".. only to be invited to resume training some 7 days later... but this time i refused...

8. i had deposited a 1000USD check in my commomwealth account on the 13th of jan.. n i havent received the money yet.. it seems ill get in on 22nd of Feb.. talk about waiting!!

9. i recently transfered 100$ from my cheque account to my savings account in a west ryde atm.. n it has DISAPPEARED!! n the statement shows that i have withdrawn it...

10. i just got an email from my uni yesterday that i was low in ATTENDANCE in one subject... n tht too coz i had FORGOTTEN to sign the attendance sheet..

11. Now coming back to jobs... my latest job.. in a call centre,..I jus got the news yesterday evenin that the call centre has SHUT DOWN due to lack of TECHNICAL SUPPORT.. THAT TWO WITHIN 2 DAYS OF MY JOININ IT!!

12. u think this is strange???? now read this... FUCKIN MY UNI HAS CHANGED NOW!! my course got TAKEN OVER by another independant organisation... so now im no longer a student of UWS but am a student of some weird SYDNEY GRADUATE SCHOOL OF MANAGEMENT!! GOD SAVE ME..

13.. AND TO ADD INSULT TO INJURY,, yesterday night a COCKROACH BIT ME!!! now i cannot walk...

wat is happenin wit me?? i have no clue.. wat i had not experienced in 21 years in bombay i have experienced it in 4 months in this weird country.. i guess someone up there doesnt like me anymore..

2006-01-10T23:10:00.000+11:00

to my love..

its 4 am in the morning.. n im not able to go to sleep.. perhaps im thinking of her.. as usual.. wats she doin..is she asleep.. is she doin good.. is she missin me.. i donno about her.. but im certainly missin her like crazy.. its kinda weird actually.. when i was back in bombay i never used to love her this way.. i think i took her for granted.. n even she knew it.. still she din ever say a word and accepted me as i was.. for who i was.. perhaps this is the price im payin for that.. i always argue one thing with her.. jus to make her feel happy i guess.. that i love her more than how much she loves me.. but i know im wrong.. for there is no one else in this world who can love me as much as she does.. even though im in a rough patch of life right now.. i know one thing.. sheel always be there for me.. n that i guess keeps me goin.. i donno if ill be able to live without her love n support..
i want to tell her one thing.. the five years shees spent with me.. have been the happiest years of my life..

this moment of time im remimded of one song.. i guess its always been one of my favorites.. but i could never relate to it as much as i do today..

this one is for you baby... love u lots..

Aerosmith--I Don't Want To Miss A Thing

I could stay awake just to hear you breathing

Watch you smile while you are sleeping

While you're far away dreaming

I could spend my life in this sweet surrender

I could stay lost in this moment forever

Every moment spent with you is a moment I treasure

Don't want to close my eyes

I don't want to fall asleep

Cause I'd miss you baby

And I don't want to miss a thing

Cause even when I dream of you

The sweetest dream will never do

I'd still miss you baby

And I don't want to miss a thing

Lying close to you feeling your heart beating

And I'm wondering what you're dreaming

Wondering if it's me you're seeing

Then I kiss your eyes

And thank God we're together

I just want to stay with you in this moment forever

Forever and ever

Don't want to close my eyes

I don't want to fall asleep

Cause I'd miss you baby

And I don't want to miss a thing

Cause even when I dream of you

The sweetest dream will never do

I'd still miss you baby

And I don't want to miss a thing

I don't want to miss one smile

I don't want to miss one kiss

I just want to be with you

Right here with you, just like this

I just want to hold you close

Feel your heart so close to mine

And just stay here in this moment

For all the rest of time

Don't want to close my eyes

I don't want to fall asleep

Cause I'd miss you baby

And I don't want to miss a thing

Cause even when I dream of you

The sweetest dream will never do

I'd still miss you baby

And I don't want to miss a thing

Don't want to close my eyes

I don't want to fall asleep

I don't want to miss a thing.

Aerosmith..

i guess this has to be one of aerosmiths greatest songs ever..

2006-01-09T18:22:00.000+11:00

days of our life"??

4 years!! seems jus like yesterday.. i still remember that night.. i had decided to write a book!! i guess its every book lovers fantasy to write a book.. but i actually went one step ahead and committed myself to writing a book.. topic?? it wasnt that difficult to find one.. what better topic than to describe the emotional turmoil i had gone through those few months..

yes it was about me.. and my friends.. it was about friendship.. about trust.. which i had betrayed so hopelessly.. about infatuation.. which to me was a synonym to friendship.. i guess i used to fall in love with every second female i met.. and about true love.. which i never recognized until it was almost too late..

yes it was about that gloomy summer of 2002... the year everything went wrong for me.. and that too coz of me.. so i temporarily named the so called book "days of our life".. until i could find a nice name for it.. but as it always happens,, i got bored of it too.. n more because as it was almost a true story,, i got more and more dismayed by the thought of it and before i knew it,, before the first 40 pages were written,, it was forgotten.. forgotten until last week when dev told me to create a blogspot.. and then i thought. why not? why not go back to where i started from.. of course i dont have the patience to write a book.. but why not start something at least..

so i decided to name the spot "days of our life".. a nostalgic tribute to that one summer four years back which entirely changed everything i believed in and everything i stood for..